Bloodstains and Rejections
by veiledprincess1991
Summary: When Belarus is hurt again by her brother, who comes to save her from herself? Will this be enough?  WARNING! SELF-HARM!
1. Chapter 1

**Um so this is my first fanfic. Please review, but please try to be nice. **

**This story isn't based off any historical event, unless I don't know about it, if so please tell me. I really just like the Belarus/Japan pairing. :) Hetalia and charectors belong to Hidekaz Himaruya.**

**There is some self-harm in the story, so if it triggers anything please don't read. **

**Anything else I need to add? Have fun reading :D  
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**Bloodstains and Rejections**

Trudging through the forest, in the cold and rain, a young woman in a tattered blue dress and tangled, long, blonde hair was on her way home. Watching in the distance was an older man in a clean white suit and carefully combed black hair. As the young woman reached her dark house, she ran upstairs and flung herself on her bed without changing out of her dirty, wet clothing. Grasping her pillow with all the force she could she started to cry. Her tears were ones of someone rejected by the one that she wanted so badly; she knew it was wrong to love her brother like that, but how else was she supposed to love him? He didn't want to protect her like a brother should protect her; by all rights she should hate him. And she did, she really did hate him. Yet she wanted to be with him, never really wanted to leave him in the first place. Starting out with gentle quiet sniffles, she soon started to cry, harder sobs with great noise and violent tears.

As her body was soon spent from crying she reached in and found the small pocket knife hidden in her bedside table. This knife was never to be seen by others, not even her dear sister. Ukraine would try to help, but would end up suffocating her sister with her constant mothering. No, Big Sister couldn't find out about this secret. There was a reason that Belarus always wore long sleeves, high necks and tights. Not really showing much skin was the only way to hide the scars that ran all over her body. Her arms, legs and stomach were covered in the words that represented the feelings she felt. Rejection, hate, pain: all words that filled her lonely and dark world.

After the bloody deed was done, her body scarred and broken more and her bedspread covered with brilliant red stains, she collapsed on her wet pillow and fell asleep.

In the forest the man waited. He kept wanting to go stop her before it was too late, but never had the courage to go in while she was awake. She would tear that knife into him if she knew he knew about this secret. He sadly remembered finding out the secret his beloved Soviet princess held. The poor girl was a young teenager at the time and was, as most awkward teenagers are, rather clumsy. She had tripped chasing her big brother down a flight of stairs at a world meeting, tripped and cried, and that idiot hadn't helped her. So what if she loved him inappropriately? He was her brother. After being shocked by Russia's lack of compassion for a little sister, Japan shyly walked up to her and helped her up. As he helped her out, he realized that the sleeve of her dress had ripped open, exposing scars, both new and old. Not wanting her to catch his stare and hiding his emotions about this cold beauty, he had quickly run away. Since then, he tried to look out for her and was always the one to clean her up when she was passed out cold from exhausting herself from the cutting and the crying.

Sneaking into the house of the blonde, he quietly tiptoed to her room to listen. When he no longer heard her crying out in pain and loneliness, he slowly opened the door to her room and saw that she was angelically curled up. Her face looked the most peaceful when she was sleeping, even when she was covered in blood, cuts and rain. Her mascara had run down her cheeks, streaks of midnight black covering the smooth pale face, but yet all he could think of was an angel sleeping. Slipping into her bathroom, he ran water in a basin with cherry blossom scented soap. Returning to her he slowly and carefully rolled what was left of her sleeves up and started to wash her arms of everything. He wished he could rub all the negative feelings about herself away, but he did what he could. As he finished cleaning these new scars he felt her stir in his arms. He stiffened, waiting for the knife to come out and stab him.

As she slowly began to wake up, she could feel something warm and wet running up and down her arms. She could also smell some sort of floral smell. It was the same smell that penetrated her room every morning after these episodes. Maybe now she could see who it was that knew her secret. She had been so careful not to let people know. As she slowly opened her eyes, she saw big brown shocked eyes looking into her blue ones. She remembered looking into those same eyes a few years ago when he helped her up after she fell. She never had the chance to ask him his name or much less thank him. At the moment, she had been too caught up trying to chase her brother and hadn't thought about it until afterwards. She slowly replayed that moment of remembering someone who didn't act like she was creepy and inhumane. She had soon forgotten that moment in her depression and anger. Replaying it in her head, she realized what he had seen because her sleeve had ripped. As she realized that she was finally face to face with that one person that cared enough to try, she gasped and her eyes watered up again.

As he looked into those cold blue eyes, he started to put her back on her bed to leave, but she held on.

"Please don't leave me again"

He looked startled to hear her voice sound so childish and innocent. From what he had heard from others, it was supposedly harsh and shrewish. He had no clue what to say to that request from one so protective of herself. He said the first thing that came to his mind.

"Are you, um, hungry? I can make you something to eat." He was starting to get embarrassed by the fact he was alone in her room with her. "You should probably eat something." He could see her trying to deny that statement, but at the moment her stomach decided to grumble from not eating in a bit.

"I suppose I should; while you are doing that, I guess I should finish what you were doing." She started to blush from the positions that both were in.

After he left the room and she finished washing herself, she realized she still didn't know his name or why he treated her like she mattered. It was so different from how Brother Russia treated her. The moment she thought of her brother, she collapsed on the floor of the bathroom and started to cry again.

Wondering what was taking the Soviet princess so long, Japan went upstairs and knocked on her bedroom door. He pondered what to do when he heard crying coming from inside. On a brash moment, he decided that he should go in. He didn't want to clean her up another time this night, especially after the embarrassing moment earlier. Upon entering, he saw the bathroom door open and her long blonde hair on the floor. Fearing she was hurt, he ran across the room, scooped her up into his arms and carried her to the bed. Sitting on her bed, he held her as she finished crying and fell asleep again.


	2. Chapter 2

**So I decided to continue this, People actually read the first chapter. I would like to thank **UnifiedNations **for writing a review. I love finding people that love this pairing. Thank you dearie! I shall try to write another chapter soon and try to do some more fluff there. **

**I don't own Hetalia or any of the characters.**

**Enjoy reading! =D**

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><p>The morning came too quickly for Belarus. She dreamed she was warm, content and loved. Opening her eyes she looked around her room. Something was off. It was too bright, cheerful and clean. She looked towards the window. That was what was wrong. Her dark, heavy curtains were no longer hanging up. She wondered why they were down. She didn't remember taking them down. Looking around her room she saw that it was cleaner then it normally was. Wondering if Ukraine was around Belarus panicked. Her arms, the mess, the knife were all visible and noticeable. Looking down at her arms she saw the bandages, He was here again. She suddenly remembered what happened after she fell asleep last night. She <em>had <em>woken up and saw the one that bandaged her arms and made something for her to eat was here. She _did _sleep in his arms. But who was he? This man knew about this secret of hers and yet Belarus didn't know anything about him. Not even his name.

She took a deep breath in. Doing so she smelled something that was coming from downstairs. She realized someone, either Ukraine or Lithuania, was here. Ukraine almost always came sometime in the days after Belarus did something stupid towards their brother. Lithuania usually showed up the day after with a note from Russia, telling her to stay away for good. Lithuania never came in. He usually waited outside her door in the cold. Ukraine would usually come in and make something for her little sister to eat while she waited for her to wake up. Deciding to get out of bed and see who the unwanted visitor was, Belarus got up and changed into one of the clean dresses that was hanging in her closest. She didn't remember cleaning anything. What was going on in her house? She grabbed one of her sharper knifes from the shelf where she kept them and started towards the door, ready to strike.

She didn't have to go far to find the intruder. She opened the door to find his hand on the doorknob, prepared to open it. She was in shock to see the same warm brown eye as last night. They stood there for a moment. Her icy blue eyes staring at his comforting brown eyes until He decided that explaining would be a good thing before she became violent towards him.

"I didn't know that you were awake. I was going to leave befo-"

"Why are you here? Who are you? What are you doing in my house, taking care of me? I don't even know if you are real or if this is part of my dreams. How did you know?" Belarus cut into what he was saying.

Japan stared at her for a moment with soft, tender eyes. "Miss Belarus, I am real, and here because I find the way Russia treats you is horrendous. I can't stand it at all. It makes me almost hate him. I am sure you remember the first time you saw me. I thought I saw the light of remembrance in your eyes last night. Miss Belarus? Are you alright?" He asked when he saw her face get really pale.

"Don't hate Big brother! I love him and he loves me! We are going to get married! I need to go find him right now and make him marry me." Belarus tried to get past the man in the doorway, who wouldn't let her through. "Let me through so that I can find Big Brother! He needs me. I need him!"

"I am sorry Miss Belarus. I can't let you leave. You need food before you collapse. Please eat and think about this whole situation."

"Food? Who needs to eat food when they are in love? I don't need to eat."

"Miss Belarus, please eat. You are useless to your people if you don't eat. You are weak." Japan grabbed the knife that was still in her hand and Put it on his person out of her reach before gently taking hold of her hand leading her down the stairs. "Come, I made you food. Please eat and then I will go with you to Russia's. I don't want you to pass out while walking there." He sat Belarus down at the kitchen table in front of a bowl of soup. He produced a brush from a large bag on the floor and started running it through the blonde hair and adding the woman's black bow.

Belarus sat there and ate while this man fixed her hair. It has been awhile since someone fixed it besides herself. Ukraine used to fix her hair, but after moving out a few years ago, big sister grew distance from her. The food was good, simple but rather good. As she ate she regained more and more energy. She heard a knock at the door and felt the man stop what he was doing in shock, like he was caught doing something he shouldn't have been doing.

"It is probably just Lithuania. He usually comes with a message of sorts from Big Brother the day after I do something wrong. Big Brother enjoys pointing out my faults. I should go to the door." Belarus said as she tried to get up from the chair.

"I will get it Miss Belarus. Please finish eating. You need the food." Before Belarus could respond he was gone. She heard voices coming from the front hall. She had to see if it was really Lithuania. She poked her head around the corner. Yep it was that little annoying one. He seemed to be arguing with her still unknown savior. It seemed that no one was expecting someone to be here with her. She smiled to herself, maybe Big brother would be jealous by another man being in her house.

Japan walked into the room and ran right into Belarus. "You were correct. It does seem to be a letter from Russia." He handed her the letter. "Lithuania didn't seem too thrilled by me being here with you. I am assuming that he is interested in you, but is scared of you as well. He said he was telling Russia that I am here. I should leave for my sake, but I will stay around if you want me too."

"You still haven't told me who you are. I keep asking and you won't say. I am assuming that you from Asia, But other than that, I have no clue. I want you to stay, but Russia is scarier than me when he is angry, so go. I have dealt with him alone before. I don't need someone to rescue me. I am far from a princess."

"I suppose you wouldn't know my name by face, seeing as you only make it to about half of the meetings anymore. When you do come you are concentrating on Russia. I am Japan."

Belarus stared at him. Russia didn't like Japan for some reason. She had over heard him talking about the much smaller Asian country before and what he said wasn't decent at all. "Big Brother doesn't like you too much. He is always saying something horrible about you. You need to leave. Go. I will take care of myself. I don't need you. I shouldn't even be talking to you right now." She turned around and left the room.

Japan stared after her as she left shaking his head. He would leave but not go far. She needed him more then she knew.


	3. Chapter 3

**I am so thankful that people are reading my story. It started out as a drabble but I am currently working on chapter 5... and there is going to be a lot more after that I think. As a warning it is going to start getting pretty weird... I am not sure what I was thinking as I wrote it. Please but in the reviews if you would like me to write a milder version. this chapter is shorter. I don't not own hetalia. Enjoy reading!**

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><p>Belarus walked upstairs to compose herself. She wasn't use to someone caring about her. The emotions that came with knowing who it was that cared were hard to deal with. She has wanted someone for so long. It was hard to abandon the feelings that came with it. She remembered that there was still the letter from her brother in her hand. She figured she should just read it now and get it over with. The letters never helped and made her feel worse about doing what she did to them both. She wondered what he would do if he knew about the cutting. She opened the letter.<p>

_Belarus, There is a world meeting this weekend. I am forbidding you to go. No one wants you to be around. They all hate you. I hate you. Don't bother coming this weekend. I will tell the other nations that you are not there because you are sick. I will not tell them that you are sick in the head. They all know you are though. I don't see why I just don't put you in a mental asylum. That is where you belong. Nothing is right about you. Russia. _

This wasn't to different then the other letters. She walked over to the locked jewelry box that she kept all of the letters in. Russia had given her the box when she and Ukraine moved out of his house, before she became obsessed with him. It matched the one that he gave Big Sister. The boxes held a necklace that matched the sickle and hammer that represented the world in which they lived together for so long. Belarus had stopped wearing the necklace a long time ago. It was underneath the letters that yelled out everything that was wrong with her. She enjoyed being crazy most of the time. It made her unforgettable in the eyes of everyone else. She wanted to be normal sometimes. But it was hard after being what she was for so long.

There was a pounding at the front door. She glanced out the window, to see who it was. It was Russia and Ukraine. Ukraine seemed to be begging Russia not to do something. Russia was ignoring her more than anything. Belarus saw the smaller nations that lived with Russia cowering back a bit. She realized Lithuania had told Russia that Japan was here with her. She saw a small movement in the trees and caught a glimpse of dark hair. He was still here. This made her feel slightly better about everything. Sighing she moved away from the window, straightened her dress and bow and marched defiantly down the stairs. One may call her crazy or psychopath, but never would anyone call her a coward.

Belarus opened the door to see exactly what she saw from upstairs, minus the small Asian country. Ukraine tried to get past Russia to be with her sister, but was blocked by his strong arm. Belarus thought to herself that things haven't changed much from the soviet days. He truly did rule with an iron fist then and will rule what he could from now on the same way. Belarus decided it may be better to start this conversation instead of her brother. They were currently in a fierce staring contest. Both of their eyes were almost entirely to slits.

"So you finally decided to come to your senses then? You realized that I am the only one that can be good enough for you ever. I am even better than any of these other nations that you surround yourself with, even Big Sister." Belarus knew none of this should be said, but she wanted to do what damage she could do before Russia started in on his anger. She knew what she said hurt Ukraine deeply, but it slipped out before she could think about what she said. There wasn't time to think of anyone else. She produced the knife she had kept hidden in the folds of her skirt and hold up to the much taller man.

"Come on Big Brother, Let's get married, married, MARRIED!" The fear in his eyes was the best part of this crazy girl act. Before she knew it, Russia nodded his head and Belarus felt arms around her and a hood tied over her face. She heard the maniacal laugh that she hadn't heard in so long. This was beginning to be like before the end of the regime. She felt herself being dragged along the cold frozen ground. She refused to cry in front of others, last night being the first time since she had moved out of Russia's home. Ukraine had always held her while she cried then. Before long she felt herself pass out from the shock of it all.

Japan watched this horrid act of siblings against siblings in pain for his beloved soviet princess. He wished he could do something to help her, but if he tried to rescue her now, things would turn out badly for both Belarus and himself. There was nothing that he could do alone, but there maybe a few other nations that would be willing to help. Japan realized that he would have to admit to them about his feelings for the psychopath nation and probably betray her deepest secret. He regretted staying until the morning. He should have left like he always did. He followed the soviets quietly all the way to the huge empty castle that Russia was still occupying. He saw them take his lovely soviet princess in the castle and then turned around and went home. He could think better about what to do at home, he may not know how to, but he knew he had to save and then protect the woman he loved.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks for reading. Once again it gets creepy.I don't own hetalia.**

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><p>Japan sat down to think about what to do to save Belarus. He felt like this was his fault. He never regretted caring. It may not have been advantageous to care about her, but he had to. He couldn't let her suffer alone anymore then he had. She was worth being loved. He didn't know how long he had loved her though. He wasn't used to loving people. He kept himself closed off to so many people in the past. He has just started opening up when he met Germany and Italy just a few years ago. While he wasn't close to either one of them he did respect them. Well at least Germany. Italy was, still a bit immature. Japan remembered a conversation with his allies about the blonde women he had been secretly following. Italy was purely scared of her and had started shaking when he had just said her name. Germany has gone pale and shuddered. Japan didn't tell them what he knew when he brought her up. Both European countries had told him to stay away from Belarus. He hadn't and now his soviet princess was at the wrath of her brother and his enemy, Russia. Japan felt he had to save her. He had no clue what Russia would do to her. Japan didn't really see how it was such a big deal. It isn't like Belarus had came to him to be comforted. Russia didn't even know Belarus. He just saw her as a creepy little girl. Not as the not the lonely young woman that she grew up to be. Japan didn't know what made her do what she did, but it had to be hard to grow up behind the iron curtain.<p>

Japan looked down at his phone, he thought about calling a small meeting of some countries. He had a fair number that might help him run a rescue mission. Not many were fond of Russia and knew that he could be scary. But then again, Belarus was just as bad to them. It took someone special to creep Russia out. But what if moving her away from Russia made her better? He decided that it couldn't be helped, He couldn't save her alone. He started making some phone calls while trying to think of a reason he was at Belarus' house.

Belarus felt the cold floor of a familiar room under her. She shivered, not because of the cold, but the memories that came with it. She couldn't deal with it. She needed to get out. She heard the steps of someone coming closer to her and felt a kick at her side.

"Little sister, you are awake now. The fun can start. Kolkolkolkol." She heard the creepy voice of her big brother.

"Big brother? What are you going to do to me? Why am I here?" Belarus tried question her brother from her spot on the floor.

Russia glared at the girl lying on the floor in front of him, blindfolded and tied up. He had noticed when he went to get her that her hair was brushed and looked shiny. Her bow was on perfectly straight and her dress and apron were clean. She never looked that put together for him. She must love that Asian better than him. He wanted to stay number one in her heart. He didn't want to marry her because she was his sister. However he didn't want anyone else to be with her. If she wasn't his sister he wouldn't mind becoming one with her. She was pretty and tough. She was better than Ukraine. Ukraine was scared of most other countries and while she was pretty, she was too cumbersome.

He reached down to take hold of the girl, tied her to a chair and un-blindfolded her.

"You don't remember our agreement that we made when you left. There must be no alliances made with my enemies. You know that Japan and I have always been enemies and that is the first one you went to after I turned you down again." He glared at her. "There is not room for both of us in your heart, decide now who you want."

Belarus looked up at her brother while trying not to cry. "Big brother, I love you I do, but you hurt me, you always have. It wasn't my choice to have him there. I don't love him like I love you. I don't want to marry him. I want to marry you!"

At these last words Russia struck her across the face. "I will not marry you! You are a creepy girl and besides you are my sister! I will never marry you! If it wasn't your choice to have him there then why was he there? Did he force himself on you?"

"Force himself? No, big brother, Japan wouldn't do that. And as to why he was there, have you ever thought about what happens after you kick me out of your house? Do you think I just go back trying to find a way to marry you? I am not constantly trying to figure out how to marry you. I am just trying to figure out what is wrong with me. What makes someone else better? Why can't someone love me as much as Canada loves Ukraine? Why I am not loved? I am barely loved by big sister, and you can't stand me. You never have been able to. You hate me for some reason. I don't know what I did to make you hate me, but it isn't fair to be so unloved."

She couldn't do it anymore. The emotions that have been building up for such a long time finally broke. She started to cry as she yelled. Her brother stared at her and smirked. He had finally seen her cry. Belarus continued on her tirade until her brother slapped her again. She stopped and looked at him through tears.

"You need to grow up. Stop crying and ranting on. You are a mad woman and do not deserve anyone. You disgust me, you don't even deserve to be called my sister. You shall stay here and think about what you did. Maybe if you are well-behaved I will let you go. But you need to learn a lesson. Now I have an Asian country to attack." With that Russia turned and left with his scarf flying behind him and caressing the cheek of Belarus.


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